| 1. | Word processors never display a cursor. |
| 2. | You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences. |
| 3. | All monitors display 2 inch high letters. |
| 4. | High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces. |
| 5. | Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English. |
| 6. | Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard. |
| 7. | Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause temperatures in computers, just like they do in humans. After a while, smoke billows out of disk drives and monitors. |
| 8. | All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off. |
| 9. | Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen. |
| 10. | All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward. See #7, above) |
| 11. | People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data. |
| 12. | A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries. |
| 13. | Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function. |
| 14. | Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second. |
| 15. | When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building. |
| 16. | If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file,it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a backup file-and there are no undelete utilities. |
| 17. | If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it. |
| 18. | No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms. |
| 19. | The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has. However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labelled. |
| 20. | Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability. |
| 21. | Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY- MP. |
| 22. | Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face. |
| 23. | Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress. |
| 24. | Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow down users. |
| 25. | Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to. For example: |
| "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner? I don't know, let's check. | |
| It's the murder weapon!". "Let's look under the bed for the killers shoes. No, just some comics books (Marvel 1954, very rare). Let's check the closet shelves..." |
Source:
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