People are always asking me why the show isn't on Comedy Central or Channel 32 or some such place, and the simple answer is nobody wants it. The show has been offered to numerous media outlets over the years and these stations have consistently shown no interest whatsoever. So, we are stuck with the Chicago Access Corporation. They don't like us either, but they have no choice but to show WGIF. It will be the happiest day in CAC history when we decide to stop doing the show. However, for now, we are stuck with each other. The air time officially is mine (it could be yours if you live in Chicago and put together a show). CAC is merely the custodian of the airwaves. They are there to facilitate the use of the medium. They're not a regular TV station, and they have no authority over the content of their programs (like say a Ted Turner or Les Moonves would have). However, that didn't stop them from butting in to my affairs as I have described below. The other reason I hate CAC is they just suck. We are on the same channel as every crack pot, nut job with a theory about Mayor Daley or the Tri-lateral Commision. Channel 19 is full of crap, and we're right there with them. It's like if Fred Astaire tried to dance in a sewer. Also, CAC has never done squat to promote our show or encourage us in any way. So, fuck them. The lowest rung in hell is reserved for people who are executives at public television stations. Here is a recounting of CAC's worst war crime--the time they censored WGIF:
It happened to Voltaire. It happened to Lenny Bruce. And it happened to me.
In March of 1998, the storm troopers who run CAN-TV censored Geniuses like a pack of soulless jackals. On March 13 and 20 of that year, a bastardized version of WGIF was aired. There was a segment where I was pretending to be on a variety of CH. 19 shows including The Bobby Davis Blues Show, Slippage Frame, and Models on Parade. The humor was supposed to come from the incongruity of my appearance on these programs: my dorky dancing on Bobby Davis, my lascivious comments on Models on Parade, and so on. There aren't even people on Slippage Frame--let alone one making wacky noises.
One of the other shows chosen was "Message to the Blackman" which is produced by the followers of uberracist and friend of Al Queda Minister Louis Farrakhan. If you've ever watched Ch. 19 you have probably run across one of a dozen shows they produce all with the same host and format and are on roughly every fifteen minutes. My mock appearance was supposed to be funny because 1) you wouldn't expect me to be a guest on one of these shows, 2) you wouldn't expect a guest on one of these shows to act as goofy as I did, and 3) I was treating the host, who takes himself ultra-seriously, with irreverence. If I do say myself, it was an amusing little bit. However, you will never know. Storm troopers don't have much of a sense of humor, and they would not allow me to show it because they did not want to incur the wrath of the Farrakhan zealots. So in order for the sketch to air at all, they forced me to butcher my own program by taking out the audio and video of the interviewer and replacing it with a black screen that read FOOTAGE CAN NOT BE SHOWN AT THIS TIME. I wanted to put up a screen that said CENSORED. but they wouldn't let me do that. They censored the word censored! If you say this bit you probably thought I was on the crack pipe.
What complicated this matter was that I was an employee of CAC at the time. I guess because they were paying me ten dollars an hour they thought they could control my mind. I quit that shit hole directly after this incident and have not regretted it for one instance. The first amendment does not carry a lot of weight over at Ch. 19. If you ever get frustrated and feel like yelling profanities at someone, let me suggest picking up the phone, calling CAC (312-738-1400), and just screaming a tirade of swear words at their answering machine. Or fax them a piece of paper with Helter Skelter scrawled on it (312-738-2519). Or go to their web page (cantv.org) and e-mail them something nasty about their grandmothers giving oral sex to the Taliban. If anyone ever asks you, the administration of CAC is a bunch of scum bags. It is the worst television station in the history of humanity, and I'm stuck there.