Anyway, on November 11, I got a call from some nervous sounding Univision legal clerk toady, John Paul Aceves, in Los Angeles. He wanted to know if I was the guy who was superimposing (wrong word TV genius) dialog over telenovelas on an access station in Chicago. I said that was me. He asked if I would stop doing this. I said I'm not going to stop doing anything because some guy who can't pass the bar exam wants me to. He said I was using the footage inappropriately. I said that's his opinion. He said I was using it illegally. I again said that's his opinion. I then told him that I didn't get the footage from Univision. He asked me where I got it. I wouldn't say. The conversation ended with him saying "I guess we'll have to do this the hard way. We're going to hire a lawyer in Chicago."
The use of footage from other television shows is not illegal. It falls under the legal concept of fair use--a reasonable and limited use of a copyrighted work without the author's permission, such as quoting from a book in a book review or using parts of it in a parody. Sounds pretty cut and dry to me. Also, if the government were to prevent me from showing "Dale Chapman's Boarding School for Misbehaving Girls," it would infringe my First Amendment rights--the constitutional amendment ratified with the Bill of Rights in 1791, guaranteeing the freedoms of speech, religion, press, assembley, and petition. People died on the beaches of Normandy and Anzio so I could tell jokes about having sex with underage girls. I could see why the people at Univision were confused, because I believe the First Amendment of the Mexican Constitution says something about bean dip. My case is further strengthened because I don't profit monetarily from this footage, I don't effect their market.
The saga continues. On November 26, I got a letter from John Paul that he sent to the Chicago Access Corporation offices. Here are some of the highlights:
We have been informed you are broadcasting certain telenovelas and programs including but not limited to Amigas y Rivales and Caliente without Univision's permission. Univision has the exclusive rights in and to these works in the United States; your activity infringes upon Univision's rights and must be stopped immediately.
Title 17 of the United States Code provides that penalties for copyright infringement include an award of damages of up to $100,000 per unlawful act, attorney's fees and costs.
We demand you immediately cease broadcasting these telenovelas and programs and destroy any copies of the works. In the event you fail to contact me by November 30, 2002, Univision will pursue all legal remedies and will hold you and all those acting in concert with you fully accountable for any and all damages and lost profits which may be sustained by reason of such misconduct.
The first thing I found intriguing
is Mexicans call their soap operas telenovelas. I guess instead of
books they have libraries full of this crap. The second thing that
struck me is they want me to destroy all copies of the bits. Hitler
anyone? That's like if I told them to destroy all their burritos.
I guess when all you show are Latin chicks with boob jobs in skimpy outfits
the concept of artistic integrity doesn't mean too much. But the
craziest thing about the whole letter is their claim that I'm using footage
from Amigas y Rivales. THAT IS NOT THE SOAP OPERA I'M
DUBBING. Again, the soap opera I use comes from a different Spanish
language station and has not been on the air in over a year. This
is like if CBS was suing me because I showed clips from Friends.
Actually, it's like if I was showing Friends but CBS thought it
was footage from The King of Queens. I think the legal department
of Univision is run by the guy in the bee suit on The Simpsons.
Anyway, it's going to take more than a bunch of morons in bee suits to
stop me from showing "Dale Chapman's Boarding School for Misbehaving Girls."
Larry Flynt, Jesus Christ, and the Marquis de Sade were all crucified for
their unorthodox views, I guess I'm next. Come and get me, you bee
suit wearing idiots! Univision should stick to what it does best...making
soft core porn for illegal immigrants,