(If you grew up in LA in the '50s, or lived in the Haight-Ashbury area of SF in the '60s, and knew a Hillary Jiler, that was her name before she got married.)
I lived with Hillary from April, 2000-Sept, 2005.
We met online in August, 1999 through ICQ*, when I was WAY out of town. I
was visiting Kalamazoo, MI, where I lived for most of 1966-1994. We agreed to
meet after I flew back to Las Vegas, and it seemed sort of "fated".
*luckily, she was not using her previous screen name "LVgrany", which
said in her info that she was "raising my 3 year old grand daughter".
We were both born in 1948 and both married in 1968 and both moved to Las Vegas in 1994, she after the breakup of her *25* year marriage!
After we met I dragged her to meetings of my local Mensa group, Southern Nevada Mensa. While she was a non member, one member (GQ) commented that she did more work for the group than most members! (GQ was on the Executive Committee of SNvM, as was I; Hillary frequently sat in on ExCom meetings and was always welcolmed.)(Hillary was a *natural* for Mensa; her obvious intelligence was perceived not only by me but by others like CM, our LocSec("President") then.
She did not seem to be particularly nervous about taking the Mensa test, nor did she seem particularly surprised when she passed, and joined Mensa as of 12/2002. She was asked almost immediately by the then-President of SNvMto become Editor of our newsletter, Mind Bets.
At the 2004 AG(Annual Gathering of US Mensa) in Las Vegas, she worked, and even slept in the Crafts Room. (She was credited by the AG Chair with suggesting the AG 04 tag line: "ExtravAGanza".)
She also, at various times was elected SNvM Communications Officer, and Program Chair. In 9/05 she was Election Chair and had spent considerable time trying to set up an RG(Regional Gathering) here, and was STILL Editor of Mind Bets. (While working 12 hour shifts as a taxi driver for Yellow, Checker, and Star Cabs.)
She had a brilliant mind, but like most Mensans was not 100% rational. She had to know that 40+ years of very heavy smoking was not a prescription for good health. She was not literally a chain smoker, but she was as close as you could be to being one without lighting each new cigarette from the previous one. (I know personally a Mensan who is *extremely* intelligent but looks like he could have been in the movie Super Size Me. Hillary did not have a monopoly on irrational behaviour in Southern Nevada area Mensa members.)
FWIW, Hillary died peacefully in her sleep. One of her fellow members commented, "I hope I die that way, too!"
Hillary will not be forgotten any time soon, especially by me, and by her good friends Cookie Bakke and Carole Moran.
(Note: Hillary was not born a blonde. When I met her she was 51, and had dyed her thinning brown hair. Later she cut her hair off and always wore blonde wigs. This picture shows her in the dyed blonde hair stage. Some women are so vain! I only cared about what was inside her skull, not what was outside!)
If Hillary were still alive and Editor of Mind Bets, I would submit this for use on the cover, and I think she would seriously consider it; she once (Aug, 2003 issue) ran on the cover a series of things Abe Lincoln did not say, one of which was, "Somewhere in Texas a village is missing an idiot."
Written 9-23-05 by someone who loved her, John C Hunter
Added 9-25-05:
"Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got
Till it's gone"
from
Big Yellow Taxi, by Joni Mitchell
Added 10-1-05:
This song reminds me of Hillary: Another
Song, by The Carpenters
Added 11-1-05:
I don't think there is an afterlife, but if there is.....Hillary, I miss you a
LOT!
Added 11-3-05:
I don't think there is a Hell, but if there is, there should be a special place
for people who manufacture and sell products that are both addictive and
destructive of life, like cigarettes (Centers for
Disease Control smoking info).
Added 8-8-11:
Today I found a Pizza My Heart, a
CA pizza chain, T-shirt in my closet. It must have been Hillary's. I love
pizza, and will visit Pizza My Heart the next time I am in CA
Added 8-27-11
A column of Hillary's that appeared in the June, 2005 Mind Bets was reprinted
in the September 2011 issue!
Note: There was a "Memorial Service" for Hillary a few weeks after she died at the Rio Hotel and Casino. Sadly, although Hillary, her ex-husband, and her two sons were/are Jewish, this was done on Oct 13, 2005; Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, when observant Jews do not mourn. A number of Hillary's best friends were observant Jews, and could not attend. Hillary was a non-observant Jew.
(I had completely forgotten: Hillary was a big supporter of the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Her sons asked that memorial contributions be made to them.)
If Hillary's granddaughter (Sydney) ever reads this, I want her to know that
Hillary thought she was really great! A picture of Sydney in the early 2000s:
The granddaughter once said, "Grandma, your smoking makes me cough!
(Hillary told me the story of her granddaughter's early life; although I
usually dislike little kids, this one was remarkably well adjusted. Her father
gets most of the credit.)
Hillary had a wonderful cat she had named "PK", for Pretty Kitty.
Upon her death, I "inherited" PK. I have had many cats in my life,
but PK is the very best!
(This picture was taken with a cellphone camera, and does not show PK's true
color. She is (mostly) orange.) Here is a better picture of PK, taken back in
2000:)(Sadly, PK fell ill on Thanksgiving Day, 2009, and died two days later.
Her respiratory system was very strained on these days. Could living with an
extremely heavy smoker for many years have caused this?)
DISCLAIMER: Although Hillary was basically a wonderful person, she was a compulsive gambler whose gambling cost me well over $10,000. (I'm not complaining or blaming; I accept responsibility for my inattentiveness to my finances, and knowing her was worth it.)(After all, I got PK, the perfect pet cat, and I was talked into buying a condominium. I love owning my own place and not having a landlord! I had wasted a lot of money paying rent, from my post-college days, until I met Hillary; that's about 30 year's rent down the drain.)(Of course, if I had bought a house in the 1970s, I might still be living in the Arctic state of Michigan, yuck! I might even have been conned into breeding (having children),double yuck. There are a lot of variables in life.) Sorry to record this about her gambling problem, but I'm pretty sure her ex-husband and her good friends knew this, and had an idea of what she was doing to me.
Last revision 3-7-12(Six and a half years after, and I still miss her....I keep thinking of things I would like to talk to her about.)(It really was enjoyable living with someone smart enough to get into Mensa; I had before, my ex was definately smart enough. The big differences between Hillary and my ex is that Hillary *knew* she was really smart, was not a religious nut, and did not have "baybee rabies".)