Rob E.'s Letter 11 December 1997

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.

Hey, it’s that time of year again. You know the time I mean. The $@&! car won’t start. The &#@*! roads are too icy anyway. My #@&! nose can no longer be used as an airway. And I have to put on extra layers of clothes just to get the mail. Yep, it’s the holiday season all right.

I know, “’tis the season to be jolly” and all, but I’m still adjusting to the weather. After resolving to leave Columbus winters behind me, I finally moved...into the snow belt. I must have been reading my compass backwards. But this is my second winter in Cleveland, and I’m adjusting. I’ve decided to find a way to use this weather to my advantage. Summer days spent in front of the television or in bed seemed a waste of the weather. I could have been walking, swimming, cycling, sun bathing, etc. Now that winter is here, I can waste my time guilt free.

Whipped meat; modern miracle or sign of the apocolypse?

So how is everyone else weathering the weather? I haven’t been very good about keeping in touch with everyone, I’m afraid. That’s okay, though, because there’s nothing happening. If I remember correctly, when I last wrote, I was working a temp job and watching my baby cousin, Devynne. Well, at this point in time I am working at a temp job and watching my baby cousin, Devynne. The main thing that’s changed is that Devynne has gotten a little bigger. Now instead of just lying there screaming, she can follow you around the house screaming. She’s walking, she’s babbling a lot, but not coherently(probably because she’s still hitting the bottle rather frequently), and it appears that a couple of teeth are on the way in, which is good, because I think she’s getting bored with eating only premashed foods. Mashed potatoes and squash seem natural enough, but that jar proclaiming itself to be chicken dinner is more than a little disturbing.

Speaking of things small and loud, there’s some other little people out there that either weren’t there or that I didn’t know about when I last wrote. For instance, there’s a young boy about same age as Devynne who belongs to former classmate Dori Hall. And while we’re discussing former classmates, rumor has it that Jeff and Renee Baker have recently turned over a loaded cabbage leaf as well. I can’t remember where I got this news about the recent addition to the Baker clan, but assuming it’s true then congratulations are in order for the Baker family. And to everyone else, look out, they’re multiplying. Also, and this is a confirmed report, college friends will be excited to hear about the newest slugling, Daniel Joseph Cabe, born November 28th to Andy and Jen Cabe. That makes two for the Mennonite Man as Jessica Cabe is now walking, talking, and pontificating on the driving skills of little brother, and if that makes you feel old, imagine how old Grandma and Grandpa Slug must feel.

What I did on my summer vacation

I did have a small break in the temp job/baby routine over the summer when I went to Portland, Maine for a few days to visit Martin and Tawanda and to the Finger Lakes region of New York to visit Aunt Suzanne and Uncle John. I saw seals in the Casco Bay and wineries in the hills of New York. And no, the those are not related. The seals were real and had nothing to do with the visits to the wineries. Anyhow, should I ever locate the film and get it developed, I’ll try to put some of my vacation pictures online at http://home.sprynet.com/sprynet/robe05/maine.htm. This way anyone looking at my vacation pictures will be doing so voluntarily.

That's all, folks.

Everyone must tell me how you are and what you’re up to. Some of you I haven’t spoken/written/talked to for quite a while. Alas there’s not really anything to report here. My current temp job involves stuffing letters into envelopes. The only perk is that I can listen to my tape player while I work, so I’m becoming intimately acquainted with the latest Barry Manilow album and listening tapes on various subjects such as the latest exploits of Jeeves and past life regression. On the latter subject, the tapes have not answered any questions on the existence of a past life, but have rather caused me to question the existence of a present life. I can’t seem to find any tapes to help me with this problem.

And that’s it for me. Unless you want to hear about all of the unappetizing things Devynne keeps trying to put in her mouth, I’d better sign off now. This would be about as entertaining for me to write as it would be for you to read, so I’ll refrain.

Happy holidays, everyone. However and whatever you’re celebrating, enjoy yourself. I miss you all, and would love to hear from you, so if you feel the urge, everything you need to track me down is in the letterhead. Take care.

Yours Till the Red King Wakes Up,

Rob E.

Footnotes

weathering the weather: Shane and David in California, Beth in Africa, and Heidi in Florida, I don’t want to hear it.
Dori Hall: Now Dori Morgan.
assuming it's true: This ain’t no newspaper. If you’re in search of the truth, you’d better find someone more reliable and with greater authority, maybe David Duchoveny.
Jeeves: Granted, Jeeves’ latest exploits were probably in the 1940’s, but I’m speaking of the exploits I have most recently found on audio tape.

home to the 5th Dimension

Or, if you're up to it, you can read the previous letter.