Oh well, maybe it's just me, but I have a hard time thinking about killing as a sport. The only thing I kill with reckless abandon is time. There I'm the master. I can track and kill a spare hour in the densest jungle of work, meals, social engagements, and anything else trying to fill my schedule. I may be working twelve hour days, but still my room mates come home to find me sitting in front of the television watching Deep Space 9 and eating a pint of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey. "Where do you find the time?" they ask. Well, it isn't easy, but with patience and perseverance I can track down the wiliest minutes from the most hectic day and spend them doing absolutely nothing. It takes a lot of work, but it's worth it when there's no one around, just Barry Manilow on the radio, a can of Pringles by my side, and the whole internet to explore on the screen in front of me. At the end of a couple of hours, I can shut everything down, wipe the grease off of my fingers(and keyboard), and go happily on with my day.
So, yes, I'm one of those anti-hunting, vegetarian freaks who thinks that life should be preserved not just for humans but for anyone who might feel the pain of losing it. On the other hand I don't want to offend anyone while they're in the midst of their killing mania. I know that hunting is a skill based on stealth and cunning, and that it requires a certain level of intelligence. I have a suggestion that might improve your success. With the holidays approaching, I've seen these cute Rudolph hats that are neat reindeer heads, complete with antlers. You might want to add this to your hunting gear. True, you probably won't fool any but the stupidest stag, but it's might be worth a try. And as for your fellow hunters, well surely they won't be fooled by a disguise that even a dumb deer could see through, right?
